Thursday, May 17, 2007

Embarrassing moment - Anal Probe

It is not a cheesy porn that involves a doctor. My ass got probed. Yes... I am a very suspicious guy when it comes to little bumps and lumps on my body. My first instinct is always "OMFG I got cancer". For that reason I got my balls checked a long time ago too. I vividly remember that horrifying day. My inspector was a 40s old lady who skillfully wielded a ultra sound scanning device massaged my balls. I remember that she wasn't interested. As a matter of fact, she was very indifferent, as if I was not even a human being. All I can recall now is that I stared at the ceiling in the dark room with this uninterested old lady who had her hands on my balls, and the lube felt cold... Talk about embarrassing...

The nightmare returned today. At least this time it was an old man. He was very talkative. His perpetual smile made it easier. However, I wonder why he was smiling. Maybe he saw too many horrific anus, cancers and lumps that he permanently fixed a smile on his face so that everything becomes easier for him too.... I don't know. I told him that I felt a lump in my hole and I think I got cancer. He immediately said that I don't. But anyways, we proceeded the anal probe. It turned out to be nothing. However he said the lumps were enlarged blood vessels and I should stop drinking so that it wouldn't become out of control hemorrhoids. OMFG!!!!! I didn't know what to say, I just sat there with my jaw on the floor and stared at him like dumb duck. He gave me some cream said that I should take care of my body when I am young.

That is just great, I felt so dirty... Of course I thought it'd be the best if I don't ask how that would affect my ability to embrace a cock in my ass. I just thought that would be kinda too weird as if it wasn't embarrassing and weird enough.

I just realized that this is my 100th post. Unlike a lot of bloggers, I guess I will celebrate it with my anal probe. God, when did I become an open book like this...

On a brighter note, my body fat dropped to 12%. My trainer said if I can keep this up for another month or two i should see my 6-packs soon. Well.... that beats enlarged vessels in my ass I guess T_T~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

4 comments:

Silly Billy said...

Ok, I have an even more embarrasing anal proble story, but I think that will remain silent.

Hamilton said...

WHY!!! share is a virtue!

Jules said...

Listen to the doctor. Rhoids are the reason I am having to have surgery on the 12th of June. (Although, not at all from being probed in tha anus in any way...)

Soul Seared Dreamer said...

HAHAHA. Sorry that was just too funny to not laugh.. but on a serious note - man you are such a drama queen. But yes like Jules said - be careful Rhoids are annoying fuckers.