Inappropriate employee, flaked, shallow, politics

Today truly sucked.

I am going to write four events. Event one is work experience, event two is a date that'd gone flake, event three is a rant regarding someone shallow, event four a political issue. Please be advised that if you don't want to get political, please do not read event FOUR.

Event 1,

Ok our company is passing out Berlin Walls. Yes you heard it right. Despite the fact that, Germany decided to stop disintegrate their historic walls, we still keep getting them. I just really didn't care for the wall piece, but one of our temporary worker wanted it, and she is pretty cool so we went there to get her a piece.

The assistant who was responsible for handing out the wall pieces was a major bitch. She sat there giving us this indifferent look. I tried to ease the uncomfortable moment and talked to her. This is what came out of this bitch's mouth,

"hm, can you guys give me a call first next time you come back? You know so I can get prepared, and get organized."

So I said,

"ah.. ok. well what can we do, we all just love historic walls. hehe"

"hm? what do you mean, you like walls?"

My mouth was just hanging open and I got really pissed.

"hehe, (fake laugh), I dont understand, you like walls, like the walls there." Looking at the wall behind me. fucking retard...

My coworker chimed in, "he meant the berlin wall."

"oh." rolling her eyes.

I turned my back on her, and she kept talking to me, and I proceeded talking to my coworker and left her hanging. I left the rooming without picking up the stupid wall.

Awkward? Yes, but Her tone was extremely annoying and her attitude was definitely offensive. It was as if we were those kind of people who would love to get anything for free.

The outrageous thing is that,

1. We will never come back, each employee is qualified for one piece of fucking walls and I didn't even want this piece of fucking wall.

2. WHO THE FUCK do you think you are. You are an assistant and your job description is to assist whatever your boss needs help for, and handing out the wall is one of the CORPORATE initiative. IF you can't lift your precious fingers to just hand out some boxed wall pieces, you should not have applied for your job. If you had any decent education, you would have had a real job now wouldn't you?

3. Organize WHAT? You desk was as clean as new, and all you had to do was to open a Word document, write down our employee ID and then hand out the fucking wall that is in the box NEXT to your desk.

I just hate people who have attitude for nothing. I personally don't deal with attitude well at all. Place yourself in the right position. If you think this job is so below you then get the fuck out. If you think you are better than this, go find a better job. If you take it, then don't be a anal annoyance to other people. What is worse is that we all tried to make her cheer up and all that came back were these retarded responses.

Event 2.

I have been talking to this guy from UCLA, 22-23, looks kinda cute and we had great conversations last week. So on the weekend I asked him out to have dinner and chill in Westwood. Plans were set and I was really looking forward to this. I talked to him in the afternoon around 3 pm and confirmed the event. He said he was going to take a nap but told me to call him before I leave so that he would know when I was leaving etc. Sounded all very genuine and interested.

630pm rolled by and I was ready to leave. Rested a bit in my car since he suggested I should leave a bit later to avoid traffic. Called him @ 645 the first time. Rang 6 times to voicemail. Called the second time once I reached my car around 650pm. Still voicemail. I needed gas, so I went to the gas station next to work. Meanwhile texted him telling him that I was leaving now and if he got my message let me know. Got to the gas station filled up and called one more time telling him that the drive is quite long (20 miles subject to some traffic and returning route for me would be around 30 miles), so I don't want to drive out there in case he had something come up. So I told him in the voicemail that I would wait for his call till 715 then I would be heading home. 720pm rolled by. I drove home.

830pm he texted me saying that his phone was on silence and he just woke up. Are you fucking kidding me or do I look or sound like a retard/doormat? He can't put an alarm on and took a nap that lasted almost 6 hours in the afternoon? It is just ridiculous nowadays. I mean I remembered when I grew up, as kids when I didn't understand much, I would at least inform others or do something to prevent missing an appointment. THIS WAS A DATE. I guess the chemistry wasn't as strong as I thought it was and if I were just whatevers and worth less than a small effort to set an alarm on a cellphone then so be it.

Event 3

There was this cute guy who messaged me online to talk to me. I actually really liked his looks. But after talking for a while I realized that his english could be improved a little but I didn't mind. After talking to each other a couple times, we just stopped talking, w/e, it was mutual. One day I was wondering if he was still interested, so I messaged him. He sounded interested because he started to talk about what happened in his life and what he liked etc. Then I was like so do you still wanna hang out sometimes. He was like sure, can I have more pictures? That was back then before I bought my Mac Book Pro (you see how I typed out the full name, yes I love it that much), and I do not take pictures on my own since my camera has been seized by my parents for business use. All I had was some facebook pictures usually taken from party events. A couple pictures that I had that was close shots were like 1 -2 years old. So I gave him some. He kept complaining that ah it wasn't clear enough and how I didn't want to give him my pictures etc. I told him I could provide some later when I get my computer. From there his attitude was cold and rude, so I ditched him right away.

Fast forward 1 month, I got my Mac and I posted some newly taken picture online. He then couldn't leave me alone. He emailed me three times on three occasions and tried to be cute and nice. I lost all my interests so all I told him was that we have talked before and there was no chemistry, thanks for messaging and bye bye. He just kept emailing. Today he did it again. Bitch chose the wrong time to be fake cute. So I said,

"I already told you many times, we talked and I am not interested at all, so could just freaking go away. Thank you."

Surprisingly, he emailed back saying, "oh sorry if I did something wrong, just wanted to say hi."

This could have been really sweet if I didn't already know how he was, now he just sounded desperate, shallow, and pathetic. So I said, "you didn't do anything wrong, you just pulled a typical gay stereotype, you were shallow and superficial." Then I blocked him.

I am just so surprised nowadays. Whenever I see someone who talks to me, I would at least try to look beyond the physical stuff and talk a bit. When you are nice and polite, they usually pull the I am more fabulous card on me. When you gain some attitude, they suddenly become so apologetic. How dysfunctional.

This is just in. Got Rejected in the Club by a potential one night stand This guy messaged me and said hi. I just replied something nice and he said oh hey baby it is me, sex btm, sorry I didn't get to fuck you last time, maybe we can hookup soon. Want to see my cock? Realizing who he is. I said oh hi, sorry about last time, I had a misunderstanding (which is true one of the gays told me he wanted to hook up), thanks for the advanced warning, but no thanks I will pass. God so arrogantly conceited. Freaking... But I felt good saying that because now he knows how I felt!! This is his picture. 

Event 4

CNN kept reporting how the Olympic rally has been disrupted and this definitely pisses me off. I am raised in China and got my teen --> adult education in America. I have exposure to both culture and both ideologies. With my own education and understanding, I think Tibet is no one else's business. It is a sovereignty issue that is between China and Tibet.

Tibet empire has been controlled and conquered by China hundreds of years ago and based on the Chinese empirical ruling policy, we do not interfere the nomads that roam on the remote Tibetan area. Instead they would act as a state just like any state in U.S.A. and contribute tax and donations each year to the Chinese empire that rule the inland. We did respect their spiritual leader and this agreement has always been in place. They were not allowed to invade any territory with in the Chinese border and the Chinese empire would in turn protect them from other tribes who didn't enter this treaty with Chinese empire, or foreign invaders.

This continued to modern China where the current Chinese government allowed the spiritual leader's spiritual guidance as long as they do not disrupt peace and Chinese sovereignty. Other than that, they are free people. But too bad they weren't up for the peace and as a nation, we will not tolerate treason and riot.

I am sorry if that sounded so Communism. But that has nothing to do with Communist. Just remember how we Americans, got California, Hawaii, Alaska, what happened to the Indians, Blacks and other minority who struggled for decades for equality. Should Mexico government ask for California back, people would just laugh at this idea.

Just most recently, the Absolute Vodka campaign which suggested that in an Absolute world of Mexico's heritage, half of America would be still owned by Mexico. OH dear lord no, this ad generated so much protest that the vodka's parent company had to pull the ad immediately.

Just imagine a Hawaiian royal requires Hawaii's independence and supersession from U.S.A., demanding their own constitution and sovereignty, and during this process, disrupt all local peace, start rioting, protesting with violence, you think American Federal Government would just watch? Arrest will be made and people would be killed. Is that human rights issue? Fuck no.

For people who do not understand Chinese history can simply blindly accuse China for human rights violation and think Tibet should be independent as it wishes. It is simply not like that. I am sorry that 1.x billion Chinese in China right now do not only believe that Tibet is, has always been, and will always be part of China, just like Taiwan, but also STRONGLY support the government's action. Myself included. I am sorry that they don't like that but that is how it is going to be. China will become the next super power and share the power struggle with America and Russia in the world. It is a fact. Its leaders are now all foreign educated who are firm believers of CAPITALISM and yet wielded with the convenience of Communism political tools. The nation is maturing and with improvement on all aspects of the society, its people are only enjoying their better lives. With these, some petty protests are not going to change the mind of the vast majority of the nation. The government and its people as one have similar believes and opinions and with that Tibet will never win. It is just a fact.

It is incredible that with all these western influences and these protests and criticism, my generation of Chinese, the early twentysomes have never been more pro China in history. Maybe that is a message.

I remembered that in the 40s, Mao said that he will lead China to save the world because the world is suffering from the evil capitalists. Ironically, the Chinese couldn't even meet the basic survival needs. No food, no healthcare, and no social stability. The only thing that were plenty were political movements, which were chaotic, violent, and cruel. Yet Mao wanted to save the world.

60 years later. Chinese are busting into Forbe 500 and has one of the HIGHEST living standard in the world, yet the western world is still willing to save China despite the fact that our OWN  economy here is in a DEEP hole. We are in a war we will never win; race is still the elephant in the room, and gays are treated like 3rd class citizens behind the racial minorities, etc... i am not sure who we should save first. Other people or ourselves? GET A GRIP , reality check people.

Firm Social

Another extremely long day. Woke up at 9:30am with only 5.5 hours of sleep and did my dreadful Financial Derivatives and Hedging homework. Got to school around 12:30pm and had class all the way till 6:00pm. Headed to Pasadena right after and got to the Twin Palms restaurant for KPMG's career social event.

It was actually very nice. The young recruiter was super charged with energy. You could tell that he was the right person for the job from the very beginning. I was very hungry so I went for the food immediately. I guess they really wanted to encourge people to talk more, so they provided plates that were barely the size of your palm. Forks were the normal size and they appeared to be ginormous in those plates. Everything was in its mini-sized counter parts. For example, bite-size pizzas and bbq lamb pieces. They were so small that it made me wonder if it was really for consumption or for display. Anyway, after a couple of bites, I decided to talk to people. It was extremely uncomfortable to navigate through the crowd to only get bite size pieces to feed myself. I was to recruit anyway for god's sake!

Started to talk to bunch of people. I really want to do corporate tax, so I went straight to the tax department. Talked to some interesting people. Three senior managers and 1 partner. The partner really stood out though. He was Korean and he had a very healthy face. His face was pinkish, the kind that can almost make you see the glow of his healthy blood under his skin. I was telling him how I struggled when I just transferred. How I struggled with the family stuff, my academic works, and my health problems. But then again, really, in this kind of events, whatever people spewing out there are subject to intepretation. If I were the partner I probably wouldn't believe everything that a person tells me, especially when that person brings out bunch excuses for his poor school performances -_-..... But he actually listened and told me to think outside of the box. He told me to never get discouraged and Big Four should not mean this much. Considering that I ultimately want my own business, he told me to start now and don't waste any time. He said that if I am going to work only for a few years in this field then these years in KPMG would not be substantially different from other firms. He told me even I don't make it to the Big 4, I shouldn't be depressed or disacouraged in any sense. He looked at me in the eyes and kept telling me those. He said that I was already in the right place, USC has top four accounting programs in the nation and he said I would go somewhere. I shouldn't worry.

It was quite touching actually. We talked for a long time. But later I found out he was, first not a TAX partner, but an auditing Sr. Manager, and he wasn't recruiting for LA office, instead, he was looking for people in the OC. Beh he was nice anyway.. At this moment, really I don't even care if it is for tax or audit. Stepping into the office of any of the Big 4 accounting firms would be a huge success. I want it personally and partially I want this for my parents. I know I could care less and all, but because of my family's traditional education which started back when I was like 3-4 by my grandmother, the family's name and duty is carried on. The next generation is entitled to those responsiblities. It is so not American and yet it is deeply rooted in me. I am Chinese btw lol.

I don't know. I have always liked competition. Not the atheletic kind, it is the intellectual kind. I always envisioned that I would become the richest person in the world, or the most brilliant but wicked politician, or the best lawyer etc. But I think as I mature, I see the world and life a lot different. Especially after my disease snapped when I was 12, a lot of views changed since. I still like those kind of competitiveness. But I also think that life needs its simplicity. Whenever you slow down a bit in Los Angeles, for example, lay on the beach, look at the skyscrapers at night, enjoy a good company in a nice little cafe, you can feel your life essence flowing back to you. It is like life is on stand-by mode when you are off to become the next biggest hot shot in Wallstreet; it just patiently waits for its time to show you what living is like and what life is all about. Living doesn't have to be large. A Ferrari is nice, but my Accord may just do the trick. I would like a personal jet, but it would be too large and empty if I have no real friends to share with. Yes I could buy a 50 million house and love it, but after a busy day, I can only sleep in one of the 100 bedrooms. I think THAT is scary. All the excessiveness is SCARY. Yet, at USC, especially in the Marshall School of Business or the Leventhal School of Accounting, PROFIT, MONEY, TOP SPOT, JOB, STATUS, TITLE, NETWORK, MILLIONS, BILLIONS, these are the air we are breathing in and out. It is REALLY hard to not catch a bit green fever.

For example, today in my Strategic Management class, we spent 15 minutes discussing what is a good pay. The teacher is VERY good. Harvard graduate student + PHD. Extremely energetic. He is a very astute scholar, practitioner, and observer. He makes you really think. He revealed that in America, the top 125 hedge fund manager's AVERAGE SALARY/YEAR is 350 MILLION dollars. Well if that is the case, I just want be a sucky hedge fund manager then. I will take 100 million and smile. In schools like USC, Berkeley, any of the Ivy League, the goal is to show you what you are capable of and at the same time leading you to the way to your goal. But when this is advertised too much, people's goals and dreams are tinted. People lose their directions. It is a group sink, because everyone is doing it, people stop asking questions like "is that REALLY my goal?" Hell if you really think about it, in that case, do most of the people even want all those big over the top dreams in their lives? You can only spend so much in your life time!

Bah, ok now I am just ranting. The main reason is because my GPA is low and I don't have a job offer yet. This is really frustrating and getting really really old. I hope I get a job soon, so that I can resume my hedge fund manager dreams >_<...

I found this picture and I think it makes a good point. A pyramid of knowledge and civilization and the top never looked so beautiful. It shows you the mystery, the secret, and the power that you can only access at the top. But beyond that brilliant facade, what is really there.